Hi Folks, it’s me Michael. Sometimes I feel like I killed myself. Not being on social media. Not reading the news. It’s almost like I buried myself in hole because I couldn’t handle all the noise and distraction. I just wanted to see what it would feel like, to be culturally illiterate.
What is culture illiteracy? The feeling that you cannot identify with your own culture or generation. I want to feel that. I want to feel it so bad. I want to see what it feels like to be an alien on Earth, not knowing what is going on. Just blissful and complete ignorance. Remember Cyper from the Matrix? The agents agreed to wipe his brain completely if he agreed to exchange details on the whereabouts of Morpheus and Neo.
He’s wish was that he didn’t want to REMEMBER anything. I feel like that a lot of time. The more I remember, the more I dwell, the more I get stuck. The more I ruminate. I’m tired reliving the past to always arrive at the same conclusion.
“You’re a piece of shit Michael”
Does breaking up with girls make me a piece of shit? Does using an ORCA card that wasn’t mine for 7 months make me a piece of shit? Does using the side walk with my E-Bike make me a piece of shit?
I don’t know. I could be oversimplifying or jumping to conclusions. I’m sure there are areas of grey. I’m not sure what those areas are. I don’t want to analyze what they are.
CAN I LIVE? Please let me live and please keep your voice down Michael. You are driving me absolutely crazy.
I caught myself…talking to myself the other day. Sometimes I think I am genuinely going crazy. I don’t want to tell anyone though.